Writing

I believe in a previous blog entry I mentioned that I would be spending two weeks of my summer at a writing camp.  And...uh...well, that's where I am right now.  Fun stuff.  The program is run by the Kenyon Review and is a residential camp that takes place at Kenyon College (which, incidentally, is John's alma mater).  I've only been here for about a day and a half, but I'm already having a lot of fun.

I've made a few friends, that I'll probably start to stick with for most of my time here.  My roommate is (thankfully) pretty nice, and awesome and all that.  I've also hit it off pretty well with a few people from my class group (we remain in one group with the same instructor for all of our classes).

So far I've met two or three nerdfighters (my roommate is one!), a buttload of Harry Potter fans, and two Doctor Who fans.  It's nice to be in a (physical) place where nerdiness is the norm, and eyebrows aren't quirked at "large" words.  It's also great to be in a place where I can talk about how frustrating it is to have insistent characters nagging in my mind while in the middle of another project, and not receive strange looks.

Today (actually, about a half hour ago from when I'm writing this), we got to hear P.F. Kluge talk about writing, and reading, and avoiding starvation while writing and reading.  I've so far only read one short essay by him, but I definitely intend to read a few of his novels.  From that little that I've read, I would definitely recommend him (and that'll just be my recommendation for the day).  He's also really funny.

I do hope that tomorrow there will be a bit more instruction than there was today.  Though I love prompts and free writing, I would love critique (I mean, I wouldn't love hearing it, but I'd love to have the benefit), and learning how to strengthen the areas of my writing that I feel I'm weak in (like dialogue).

I'm also really excited to possibly have the chance to do editorial work here.  An anthology of all the writers' work is going to be compiled, and it is going to be done by people within the camp (another opportunity to meet new people!).  editing is one of the things I'd love to do (along with Journalism and Library Sciences), and having real practical experience would be wonderful (and excellent resumé fodder!).

I have a secondary blog that I've been sitting on, and haven't posted on yet, but even just being here for one day, I've felt so inspired to write.  That blog is (going to be) dedicated to random thought, poetry and prose.  As well as random rants about politics and injustice I'd imagine.  When I actually start posting there I leave a link here.  I'm really hoping that I'll start updating that on a semi-regular basis.  the best way, I've found from being here so far, to be inspired to write and to keep up habitual writing is to just...write.  Constantly.  So that's what I'm vowing to spend this summer doing.  In addition to cleaning my room.

...Maybe.

Zoos! (Fake Enthusiasm)

You know what I'll never understand?  Why people love the zoo so much.  I suppose I might have liked it as a kid, but as far as I can remember, the most fun I've had at a zoo was at the petting zoo and in a butterfly house.  I like animals out where I can touch them, or be close to them, and while I don't think I'd necessarily want to be within touching distance of, say, a lion, it also doesn't seem particularly entertaining to just stand there and watch them lie around looking sad.

Maybe this is the 'animal rights' 'activist' coming out in me, though I don't normally consider myself an animal rights activist.  (Though I am a vegetarian, but that's a blog entry for another day, I think.)  It just seems unbearably mean to take an animal from their natural habitat and place them in a cage, or a glass box.  Of course, many animals in zoos were actually rescued animals, so i hardly want to accuse zoos of mass cruelty.  It just seems like an incredibly boring life, and an incredibly boring way to spend the day.

I bet the people who work at the zoos (presuming they like animals of curse) do actually have a lot of fun though.  I think it must be incredible to work with animals all day.  And while this is not something I plan to do, or even want to do with my life, I do feel a bit jealous of people who get to work with animals for a living.

And in keeping with my theme, I'm going to recommend the book The Nature of Jade.  The book features a main character who loves watching the elephants in the nearby zoo, and (possible spoiler?) eventually begins working with them.  That isn't what the book is about, but regardless, it is a beautifully written story and I really enjoyed reading it.

P.S.  Who else loved the Doctor Who mid-season finale?

Summer

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMILY :) (Just pretend it's Wednesday) (Also, I hope you're feeling better)

Summer is almost here, which is pretty awesome. I have two weeks left of school, which is also kind of strange, because this year has gone by so slowly (and it still feels like it's going slowly with 8 or 9 days left). I think this is the summer I'm looking forward to the most out of summers past, for many a reason.

1) In general, I'm looking for summer purely for what I'm planning on doing during the summer, instead of just relief to be out of school (okay, not purely)

2) I might be able to go down to Florida in June to visit Universal (by which I mean the Harry Potter theme park), because my mom has a plane ticket voucher she might not be able to use, and a cousin (or relative of some sort) who happens to live in Florida (which I didn't actually know until I jokingly suggested going to Florida - I never expect she'd take me even kinda seriously).

3) As mentioned previously (I think, somewhere) I'm going to be at Kenyon for a two week writing program, hopefully developing/fine-tuning my fictional writing technique. I'm excited to be going away from home (by which I mean the place, and also the people), and to meet new people who have at least one major thing in common with me. (It would also be pretty cool if I found a nerdfighter there)

4) I'm spending most of July (I think) in California with my dad, who I haven't seen in months. I'm excited to see my dad again, but also to see the rest of his side of the family (most of it anyway). Also, California is pretty and cool, and my dad is currently in the San Francisco Bay area. Also, Deathly Hallows Part 2 comes out in July. I'm looking forward to this (in a bittersweet kind of way, because it means the end of Harry Potter stuff release -- at least for the near future)

5) Band Camp for Marching Band is in August, and as a senior, I get to help run the show. Marching Band is tiring and time consuming, but it is also fun and full of (for the most part) awesome people. I'm hoping that, even with the additional stress of running things, the ability to have more creative control and the knowledge that it's my last hurrah, will make Marching Band in the year to come extremely fun.

Recommendation: for (relatively- to majorly-obsessed) Harry Potter fans, the website virtual-hogwarts.org, which is a very thorough RPing site that takes place in the Wizarding World. (I am not a representative of the site. Anyone who wants to join should read all of the Rules and Guideline first :)

Au Revoir!

Tech, Prom, and Joss Whedon

Hell Week is here! Well, Tech Week, actually, but that's just a technicality (pun somewhat intended). Anyway, my school's Drama Club is putting on a production of Twelve Angry Men (although, really it's Twelve Angry People, because of the female performers, but that's another technicality) at the end of the week, and I am running lights for it (which I'm pretty exited about, I get to wear a headset!). But since this is the week of the play and all, everything is going to be hectic, and I'm going to be getting home at ridiculous hours (I left at 7:45, which is actually an extremely reasonable time for Tech Week [of course, I didn't have to stay to change and hear notes, so I don't know when everyone else left]). Tech Week is always very tiring and full of tension and stress, but it is also wonderful in some ways. It's really a great opportunity to spend time with people I might not otherwise associate with on a regular basis. And while the cast generally has months to get used to one another, typically the crew is only there for one or two week. But even in that short time the people who contribute to each production (in whatever way) start to become a (really effed up) family. I also think helping with Tech form plays and performances is really fun. All of the stress and hard work ultimately pays off during the show (although this is often even more tense and stress filled than the rest of the week, albeit tempered with excitement and happiness and pride and such).

This weekend was also Prom for me, which was pretty fun. I actually only ended up deciding to go to Prom early on in the week preceding it, so I ended up going in an old Homecoming dress. It was an enjoyable time, and I really appreciated the extra time to spend with my senior friends who will, sadly, be leaving soon. I even got to dance with my crush (though only with the prodding of their sister...)! And I went to IHOP afterwards with a bunch of friends and got to wolf down chocolate-chip pancakes while talking about feminism (and Firefly a bit) (this definitely says something about my friends and I; apparently it is perfectly normal for us to have an intense discussion about feminism at 1 in the morning after Prom over pancakes). We (well, the driver) managed to get lost on the way to IHOP, which was fun (if slightly concerning at one point).

Also, I started and finished Firefly (and Serenity as well) this week, which was pretty ruttin' good. I really like Joss Whedon's writing (though, unfortunately, I have been instructed not to watch Buffy, a verdict which I am planning on challenging soon), and am immensely sad that the show was canceled, because it had potential. Though I really wish there were subtitles for the Mandarin. (Oh, for people who don't know, Firefly is a Sci-Fi western about a bunch of [nine] space-traveling outlaws on board a spaceship called Serenity [which is a Firefly model]) I have also started watching Dollhouse, which is ridiculously creepy, but (so far) is also pretty good. And while it's been a while since I've watched it, I should mention Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog which is brilliantly hilarious (and sort of sad, because Whedon likes the Anyone Can Die trope a bit too much). Anyway, I should conclude this messy paragraph by recommending everything mentioned in it (yes, this includes Buffy, even though I have only seen one episode. Enjoy it for me.)

P.S. Sorry for the rambly, spastic nature that I am sensing this post has turned into (or, indeed, started off as). I am trying to keep it short this week, in hopes of getting decent sleep, but I apparently can't do short (without a bunch of parenthetical asides) and poor transitions. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself. I will now stop thinking aloud (or through text, whatever. Technicality).

Doctor Who [Spoilers]

I can't think of anything to talk about, so I'm going to talk about Doctor Who. So, apologies to any non-Who fans. And to any Who fans who  haven't seen the past three episodes, because there will be *SPOILERS* (and, yes, I totally imagined River saying that in that she sing-songy voice she does as soon as I typed it).

So, I have to say that "The Impossible Astronaut"/"Day of the Moon" is my favorite two-parter from the Moffat era, and two of my favorite episodes in the Moffat era in general (though all of my favorite Moffat episodes are from the RTD era, funny that). I feel like before I jump in with speculation, questions and surprise, I should a mini-review of the first few episodes.

"The Impossible Astronaut" was really engaging for me, and I quite enjoyed the pacing, though the story-setup took a bit too long, perhaps, and didn't leave time for much enjoyment of the Alien of the Week, or just the Danger of the Week in general.  That said, I really liked how characterization was handled in this episode, with Amy, Rory and River having to keep such a huge secret from the Doctor. I can't imagine that would be easy, and I thought the emotions and responses from each of the characters were great, and well acted. Especially the entire scene in the diner; Karen Gillan's delivery of Amy's reaction to Rory and River worrying about the envelopes when she still thought the Doctor was gone for good was brilliant. And I have to admit that I had an internal *squee* when River slapped the Doctor, because I was honestly thinking that someone needed to do that right before it happened. I think that won River points in my book, and I'm not particularly a River fan.

"Day of the Moon" was a great conclusion to "The Impossible Astronaut", and I also enjoyed quite a bit more. I liked the visuals of the characters covered in the tally marks, which always seemed very eerie (the visuals specifically, not necessarily the significance). I find the Silence sort of creepy, only in that they have the ability to control people's actions, without people remembering. All the same, they never seemed to be that scary within the episodes, except for the Silence that killed Joy, aside from their ability to erase themselves from people's memory. I thought the hand recording things were also very cool. Which reminds me of characterization which was even better in this episode, what with Rory overhearing Amy talk about the person she really loves. The lines were written brilliantly vaguely, and Arthur Darvill's acting of Rory's distress in response to the idea that Amy might really love the Doctor was superb. I was ridiculously happy when Amy called Rory "stupid face".

Onto speculation and confusion surrounding the episodes! First off: who the heck is the child, and why is she regenerating? I came up with this weird theory that the child is some sort of weird combination of two children time-traveling between River and Amy. Meaning that the fathers would be the Doctor and Rory. Honestly, though, I'm terrible at theories and would actually much rather be completely and ridiculously surprised at whatever the truth is. But Amy's positive-negative pregnancy and the picture of her with the child are deeply fascinating. Also, is it actually the child that kills the Doctor? I'm not entirely sure whether or not to be convinced by that at this point.

The Doctor and River kissed! Um, really that was kind of just a OMG WTF moment for me, and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about the increasing blatant-ness of their having a romantic relationship, because I really don't like the idea of River being the Doctor's wife. It would be too mundane. Even still, I couldn't begin to come up with who River might "really" be.

These episodes left so many questions, and left me really excited for the rest of the season. Onto "The Curse of the Black Spot"!

In comparison to the first two episodes, this one felt a bit weak. I liked the play on the siren myth, but the episode in general seemed to lack something that the first two had. Characterization might be one, because while there were a lot of good Rory-Amy moments, I don't think most of them went anywhere. The exception would be at the end of the episode when Amy manages to save Rory and their exchanges during the last few minutes of the episode. I also liked the Doctor calling Amy "Amelia", and both of them being concerned for the other over secrets their keeping from the other. Plot-wise, the story didn't do much for me, though I certainly enjoyed it (especially the banter between the Captain and the Doctor, and Eleven's bemoaning of his lack of hat). I think that the really significant moment in the episode was the shot of the woman from "Day of the Moon" in the wall of the boat. She reminded me of the woman that visits Wilf in "The End of Time", though I'm rather certain this character will serve a  different purpose. The episode was enjoyable, but it didn't seem to move the Doctor's character on any further, and only Amy and Rory's minimally, and I think in a show that has a different supporting cast each week, the effect of the story on the main/recurring characters should be more apparent.

So those are my thoughts, I'm still looking forward to the rest of the season and I hope that it regains the speed it started off with. My recommendation will be Spiced Chai Tea (I particularly like the Ruby Red Rooibos Chai that I get from Trader Joe's, but I don't know how readily available that is elsewhere). Because it is delicious.

Peace, Love and Violence

How should you respond to the death of a tyrant?  Well, I'm not sure how you *should* respond to it, but I'm going to posit that one way you *shouldn't* is through celebration.

Yet, I don't think a lot of people seem to grasp this.

Osama bin Laden was found and killed yesterday (EDIT: he was actually found before Sunday, but a plan to capture/kill him was created to be carried out on Sunday) which, as my mom pointed out, seems rather anticlimactic.  A decade after the horror of 9/11 and with bin Laden on the run, as well as the "War on Terror", this one person, who seems to have had little organizational purpose by his end, seems insignificant.  Not insignificant in the sense that the crimes he committed were small or un-horrendous, but rather that he seems to have had little significance in terms of power and control in the recent past.

I consider myself, for the most part, a pacifist.  Now, this doesn't mean I wouldn't fight in my own defense (or have the occasional wrestling match with my siblings), but I don't  believe that anyone "deserves" to be killed.  Period.  So the idea that people in America are celebrating the death of bin Laden are celebrating, or happy that he's died (rather than happy that he won't be any more atrocities), is somewhat disturbing to me.

Of course, I understand that people who lost loved one in 9/11 might feel happy that bin Laden was gone, in a vengeful way, but since when was vengeance a good thing?  Or a thing to be celebrated?

I watched Obama's address yesterday, about bin Laden's death, and what struck me the most was that bin Laden's death was considered "justice".  My definition of justice does not include killing, and I felt uncomfortable with the idea that violence was an acceptable form of justice.

Perhaps I view this from a wider angle than simply "Osama bin laden is dead".  I think that violence breeds violence, and hate breeds hate.  The celebration or willful perpetuation of either of these things will never bring peace (or even relative peace, since I don't believe true piece is actually capable of being attained).  To quote Gabrielle (or paraphrase, since I'm terrible at quoting from memory) from Xena  "The only way to end the cycle of hate isProxy-Connection: keep-alive
Cache-Control: max-age=0

hrough love."  Sounds cheesy, but I think it's also right.

I put the response to bin Laden's death in a larger worldview, because of it's possibly larger implications.  There are plenty of (deranged) people who believe any number of people are tyrants. And while bin Laden is recognized as a tyrant by the majority of the world, what's to stop someone else from thinking killing the person *they* believe is a tyrant is acceptable.  Maybe that's a stretch, but it's unsettling to me nonetheless.

My recommendation is to go through all of these recommendations and compile them into a list, so that you might actually remember to follow through on them.

I shall part from these words I found on facebook from MLK: "I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

Facebook Activism?

So, on Thursday one of my (feminist) friends posted this picture on facebook:

She tagged the people she thought would appreciate the picture, and those people were duly appreciative. But between the combative tone of the picture, and one of the comments my friend made to someone else (my friend to a male feminist/supporter that he could "attack" from the inside), things went awry.  Essentially, one of my friends (let's refer to him as 'N'), posted a comment on the picture which essentially said "ooh, let's play girls against boys".  For some reason no one really recognized this as sarcasm, and the misunderstanding devolved into an argument, which probably could have been avoided with a simple apology, or explanation.  In the end 'N' got blocked from the conversation as the person who posted the picture (let's call her 'K') didn't want to continue with an argument that would only frustrate her.

Of course, after 'N' got banned, he posted a status saying "Blocked by [K]. Achievement? I think so. For having a legitimate argument? I think so." (For the record, 'K' is "infamous" in my school for being a "feminazi" who calls bullsh*t when she sees it [the latter is most definitely true, the former, not at all]).  Now, 'N's comment frankly seemed a bit petulant to me, but I wanted to focus on his "legitimate argument", and I did in fact address this on the comments.  The 'argument' he had first carried out on the picture didn't seem well formulated or coherent, but essentially boiled down to him believeing the picture was "inappropriately aggressive". When 'K's sister 'S' asked why he thought the picture was too aggressive, 'N' responded by saying:

[S], I say the picture is inappropriately aggressive because of the choice of words and the initial comments below the picture. I can't view the picture anymore, but I remember it using the word "fight" or something to that effect, which... may convey violent action. That, coupled with the comments below, such as your own -- "You can destroy them from the inside" (or whatever) were the cause of my disapproval, and as a result I sarcastically made my first comment. Which may have been distasteful, and/or taken seriously by others.

Another commenter 'M' added that "i completely agree with [N]. "you should be very, very afraid of me"... seriously? that's a threat that completely demeans the entire concept to be no better than what the cause is against." I posted a response in response to both of these posts, as well as my personal interpretation of the picture and the inciting incidence:

1) The top of the picture said "I fight back." and then listed things that the woman in the picture fight back against, some of which included violence, or a system that blames the victim, others which were simply gender biases. Between the two, I personally got the impression that The word "fight" was not necessarily meant in the violent sense, but rather in the protest sense of the word.  [This point was mainly a clarification for 'N', who could no longer view the picture/comments].

2) [K] said "attack" (just to correct your quotation), but I believe (hope) that she also meant this in a non-violent way, and what the substance of her comment was that [the male feminist commenter on the picture] (as a guy) can refute a misogynistic mindset.

3) The caption under the picture can seem over the top, but I took more of a "don't mess with me, because I can defend myself" rather than a threat to "attack" unprovoked. The unfortunate truth is that American society has some sort of perverse glee in victim-blaming and slut-shaming, which makes it a very dangerous world for women, because sometimes the victims are blamed to the extent that the perpetrator is not rebuked.

I think a lot of how both sides of this "argument" view the picture has a lot to do with the respective party's genders. Whereas you [N] and [M] viewed it as threatening or combative, I viewed as defensive. Why shouldn't men be afraid of me, when I'm supposed to be afraid of them? Of course the picture is abrasive, and it also seems to be divisive (as displayed in the comments here and the picture), which may be counter-productive. But it opened up a conversation, which, while full of misunderstandings, took place between people that *usually* respect one another. Anyway, that's my perspective. I commend whoever read through the whole thing. (Here's a cookie, and a smile :) [You can have a cookie as well, but I'm afraid I only have imaginary ones :/, the smile is real though :)]

The conversation continued beyond this, but I'm not going to regale you with the whole thing (at the moment its about 50 comments long...).  Though I believe I've always been a feminist, lately I've been doing a lot more reading, and talking to my friend 'S' a lot.  I think I'm still forming some of my opinions, but I appreciated this conversation, as mentioned above, because unlike most facebook conversations about sexism I've encountered, people were being civil and intelligent, something I strive to accomplish whenever I am engaged in a debate or argument, even if I feel passionately about the subject (maybe even especially).

So is this facebook activism?  I don't know, but I certainly hope that what I was saying made sense to the people on the opposite side of the argument, and that they accepted it.  The people engaged in the conversation weren't close-minded for the most part, and so I hope that my perspective may have helped to have them view the picture in a different way.  Their perspective certainly forced me to analyze how I felt about the picture, and how I responded to it, but everyone interprets things differently.

So, what issues (if any) are you passionate about?  What did you think of the picture?  Did you find you find it too aggressive (if so, why?) Or did it seem like a good message (again, if so, why?)? To the people following the blog please feel free to respond in the comments, but I ask that everyone remain civil and respectful of one another.

Recommendation: In keeping with the theme of this post, I recommend the blog Feministe, it's normally sharp, intelligent and sarcastic and is frequently witty and funny (in my opinion, I suppose)

P.S.  Hopefully the use of initials wasn't too confusing in the post, although, knowing me, I probably slipped up once and revealed someone's name. I was also wondering what people thought of the idea of me addressing the rest of the conversation next week (the "theme" could certainly be different from everyone else, though I would love to hear what you all think of the picture)?

As Above, So Below

So, I really don't know if this post will able to fit nicely (or awkwardly, even) into a theme, because I figured I should talk a little bit about my "college tour" now that it's over and I am (finally) back home.

My mom, my sisters and I left Ohio on Monday morning (closer to the afternoon, really) to drive to Pennsylvania in order to visit Haverford and Swarthmore, and on Tuesday we went to visit Haverford.  Now, before the trip, I hadn't even considered most of the schools we visited, so I wasn't particularly excited to go to Haverford (not that I was unexcited). My mom had wanted to get to Haverford by a certain time, but between getting four people awake, dressed and fed, plus the time it took to drive from the motel we were staying at to the college (plus the time for my mom to get lost) we ended up being late, and missing the tour we had originally planned on taking. But, as it happened, we ended up being early to one of the info session. Haverford's admission's office had two seniors sitting there to talk to people waiting for the info sessions about the college.  I really liked this about Haverford, and it was nice to ask questions and get a sense of the school before going to the info session.

What I really liked about Haverford that I learned from those two seniors and the info session, was the colleges' Honor Code.  Haverford's Honor Code is built on the principle's of Concern, Respect and Truth/Trust and is reviewed by the student population each semester. Throughout my time at Haverford, I was constantly impressed (upon) about how much these principle's affected the community (a word that got used too many times to count). Students were comfortable leaving their laptops out in the library (I can't even trust that my bike will still be locked to a bike rack most of the time), tests and exams are self-scheduled (I mean, with some parameters, but still), and students aren't nervous to tell their neighbors (dormmates) that their music is too loud.

On Tuesday, the plan had initially been to visit Haverford for a tour and info session, eat, go to Swarthmore where we were planning on doing another tour or info session and me sitting in a class.  I actually had been looking forward to the Swarthmore part of the day, but the plan couldn't really go as planned, with us running (well, arriving) late. My mom suggested we leave Haverford after the info session, but I found Haverford so enthralling by that point that I really didn't want to leave. Our tour guide was another (very nice) senior, who managed to give a wonderful and engaging tour, despite the ridiculous number of people on the tour. And in the process I learned more about Haverford and grew to really like it (maybe even love it a bit), and by the end of the tour I was seriously considering applying there and could see myself liking it there.

The class I visited at Swarthmore was a bit lackluster, but I think (hope) that was the case because I had decided upon a class that happened to be showing a movie that day.  I left Swarthmore that day hoping that it would similarly (if not completely) engage me the next day when we went on the tour and to the info session as Haverford had. It didn't. Our tour guide didn't seem particularly well trained, the wait for the tour was boring (and included a movie documenting different Swarthmore students' experiences that screamed cheesy testimonial infomercial), and I felt as though Swarthmore was a bit full of itself. But, maybe that's just me.

So, Wednesday we were prepared to leave PA, stopping in Philadelphia to eat and visit the Poe museum there before we were on hour way to Massachusetts. That ride was supposed to be five hours long. It was eight in the end (my mom getting lost was a recurring theme on the trip).

On Thursday we visited the next college on our list: Smith. Smith is an all women college in Northampton, Massachusetts. I was looking forward to visiting Smith, but mostly because I thought it might be a bit of fun, I never really considered it as a school I might want to go to. I never really wanted to go to an all female school, maybe on some strange idea that doing so would mean I didn't see myself as "good enough" to compete with the boys at a coed school, or that only being surrounded by women (or mostly surrounded by women, anyway) would be boring. I kinda want to slap myself for those ideas now. I suppose the first thing I learned by visiting Smith was that it's really a place where strong, intelligent and probably largely independent women come, where they are able to grow without fear of feeling or being silenced and overshadowed by men. I guess this nuance was originally lost on me. Of course, there are going to be men at Smith, since it's a part of a five college consortium, which include three coed schools (as well as another women's college).

Smith was similar to Haverford in many ways, they were both safe campuses (as in, they specified this on their tours, that the students never felt as though they were in danger), they both valued community and really worked to establish that with how they set up their housing situation, and they both had a sort of cozy, welcoming feel to them (to me at least). Smith had a prettier campus in my opinion though, and the town that it is situated in seemed a bit more inclusive and was large enough to have things to do, but small enough that it probably wouldn't seem overwhelming or scary to me if I went their (though I do like big cities, I just don't know how much I want to live in one). There were also fewer touring families at Smith, so I got a tour guide to myself, which was wonderful. My guide, Hope, really just walked next to me, taking me to various buildings, and talking to me about the school. I felt comfortable talking to her, like we were having a conversation rather than feeling like I was on a tour. I think it helped me to get a better sense of the school and atmosphere there (also, everyone [all the people we met, anyway] was super helpful and nice). I left Smith, extremely reluctant to leave Smith, and I was really longing to just enroll then and there. So, somehow, a college that I never considered I would ever be interested in, made it to the top of my list.

Which leads me to Friday, and our last visit, which was to Williams, which had been one of my top choice schools initially. I'm going to keep this one short, because this post is getting long (it's also getting late here). Essentially, I thought Williams was a really good school and it was a nice campus, but I thought that it was a place I wouldn't really fit in, let alone a place where I thought I could grow or have particularly good experiences in. So, while a school that I would have never originally considered jumped to the top, the school that had been close to the top for a long time fell to the bottom.

Sometime in the next couple weeks I will be (hopefully) going on a tour of Oberlin which is the school that I've wanted to go to for the majority of my life, to reevaluate it, and see how it compares to Smith and Haverford.

If you made it to the end of this post: here have a cookie. :)

Recommendation: If you don't read it already, I recommend the blog "Hyperbole and a Half". Because it is hilarious.

P.S. I f you hadn't already noticed, I really like post-scripts (and parenthetical asides [and sometimes, parenthetical asides within parenthetical asides]). have a great week everybody! :)

The Parts of the Whole

So, I've been driving for about nine hours from Ohio to Pennsylvania all day, and I'm extremely alert because I took two midday naps (as I'm writing it's nearly eleven PM here). We should have been driving for closer to eight hours, but my mom got lost about five times trying to find the hotel. Tomorrow morning we're visiting Swarthmore, which I'm looking forward to, and sometime before we leave PA we're visiting the Poe museum (which I am ridiculously and nerdily excited about).

Anyway, what I actually wanted to talk about today was TV tropes (well, actually, tropes in general, but probably literature more often, but I'll probably reference tvtropes.org a lot throughout the post) and analyzing literature.

Sometime in the past couple of weeks I started frequenting TV Tropes, which essentially means I was completely sucked into it with my eyes constantly glued to my computer screen and my brain constantly fixated on learning. New. Tropes. It wouldn't really surprise me if you guys have heard about TV Tropes, or just what a trope is period, but for those who don't know. A trope is a device used in various forms of media (television, film, literature) that play on ideas, impressions and assumptions already present in the audience's mind.  On the whole, tropes are tools to be used and manipulated, and are generally not clichés (though they certainly can be). TV Tropes is a wiki dedicated to pointing out these tropes and providing examples present in various forms in literature. It has a tendency to be sarcastic, witty, and incredibly informal (which is what makes it really interesting to read).  It is like Wikipedia in that you'll start off on one page, but three hours later you'll be on a completely different and likely unrelated page, possibly with ten other tabs open to look at later. Or at least this is always what happens to me.

What I find most interesting about tropes is that one trope applies to so many things, but often appears in so many different ways. Sometimes tropes are blatantly obvious, but sometimes they are used and manipulated so brilliantly that it almost becomes something entirely different. One of my favorite things to do is analyze literature, and knowing the tropes (albeit, knowing them by names that lack any sort of seriousness) helps to draw connections between different books, movies and shows.  It also helps me understand how few new ideas exist, and how I'm influenced by them.

Tropes also reflect (though they often magnify) patterns present in reality, and stereotypes that a lot of people hold. Basically, tropes are cool. Although, they can be overused and tired, or used with little to no finesse. There are also "bad" tropes, because authors and creators of different media often make the same mistakes.

Recommendation: A Great And Terible Beauty by Libba Bray. Seriously, she's a genius.

PS: A theme that this post could fit into is obsessive internet habits, or favorite academic interests, or something...

Coming Closer to the Future

So, there isn't really a planned theme this week, but if anyone wants to go along with the topic of my blog today, go ahead and maybe this week we can see about actually implementing a weekly theme.

I believe all of us are in high school (if I remember correctly), so I thought it'd make sense to talk about what we're planning on doing in the future (namely college or other post-graduation activity).

I'm a junior in high school, so I'm currently trying to pick out some colleges that I would like to go to.  Oberlin (which is actually where I live) is my top choice school, followed by Williams College in Massachusetts.  A few others I'm considering are Smith, Carleton, Kenyon, and Vanderbilt.  I've wanted to go to Oberlin since I was in third grade and had to learn about the town history, which is closely intertwined with that of the college's history.  I think what originally enamored me with the college, and made me want to go there since I was a kid, was the fact that it was the first college in the country to accept both females and African-American (The town itself was the 99th stop on the Underground Railroad -- the last stop in Ohio until you made it to Canada, if you were headed there).  But in general, Oberlin has an environment that I fit into very well, namely: liberal. And opinionated.  Oberlin very laid back (many students forgo the traditional cap-and-gown at graduation in favor of odd-ball outfits and such).  Williams, which is my second choice school, by comparison has always been described to me as somewhat conservative (or at least conservative by my standards).  Despite this it remains my top choice, and I am thoroughly excited to visit the campus to learn more about it.

This Spring Break my mom, my sisters and I are going on a college road trip of sorts.  I'm not entirely sure of all the schools we're visiting, but I know that my mom plans to take us to Swarthmore, Haverford, Princeton, Williams, Smith, and possibly Cornell. (She almost tried to suggest Yale, but...no).  I'm really looking forward to actually seeing other campuses besides Oberlin's, which I've grown up in and am ridiculously accustomed to (not that I can find my way confidently through any of the buildings -- except perhaps the Dean's office and the conservatory).  I know that if I don't get accepted to Williams or Oberlin, my next choice would be a school where I think I'd be able to get a good education, as well as fit into the social environment, so I'm hopin to gain a lot of insight from this trip.

This week I'm going to be trying to come up with questions and things I'm looking for at the colleges i visit. I think most importantly -- from an academics standpoint -- is that the college have a strong English and Writing program. I plan on being a writer (even if it happens to be freelance) when I "grow up" so I really want to go to a school with a good Creative Writing program (although, I did get accepted to a Kenyon Summer Writing Program run by the Kenyon Review).  Right now, all of my career aspirations are centered around reading, writing, or both. I would really like to go into journalism or publishing, or library science, and I intend to major in English wherever I go. That said, I really *love* learning (I mean, I'm a nerd, so I suppose that's a given), so I want to take a variety of courses across all fields. I'm really interested in taking Anthropology, Astronomy, Linguistics and Religion courses wherever I go, and I think that I might minor in French (J'aime la langue).

That's all for today! I believe I will be on the road, or else away from reliable internet next Monday, so I might post my next entry on Sunday, but I'm not sure yet.

Are we still going to do recommendations? I like them, so I'm going to recommend The Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC (it's also available as a podcast on iTunes), because Rachel Maddow is intelligent, quick-witted, funny and all around a good TV personality. The show has a tendency (understatement) to sway towards the liberal side of things, but even if that's the lens she examines news from, she is insightful regardless.

Till next week:
DFTBA!

Becoming (and Procrastinating)

I've been thinking a lot lately about who I am as a person. In the context of the larger communities I was born into (e.g. who I am as a woman, who I am as an African American citizen), The larger communities I choose to participate in (most notably Nerdfighteria, but mostly fandoms in general), the smaller groups/organizations I'm a part of (e.g. A member of: Academic Challenge Team, Drama Club, and Marching Band), and myself as an individual and how my participation in all of this various groups have influenced the person I am, and how (I hope) I influence these groups in turn.

It seems like a really cheesy cliché to point out that these years of our lives (when we're in high school and college and such), are the years in which we are changing the most and "discovering who we are" (especially since I believe that people of all ages never fully stop feeling this way, though this sentiment could be presumptive), and yet it is incredibly true that I have gone through so much change and self-reflection in the past three years, that I am a notably different person from my thirteen-year-old persona.

The most notable change that I've gone through in the past few years is my spirituality.  I was raised in a Christian household, both of my parents are very devout (my father is a minister, actually) and when i was a little kid I considered myself a "believer" as well.  My upbringing as a Christian certainly influences how I think and act and view society to some extent, though not necessarily in an explicitly religious way.  Somewhere in the past few years I became disillusioned with this 'God' persona I had spent so much of my childhood learning and hearing about (and worshiping).  At first it was simply a disbelief that any being such as this could exist.  I couldn't tell you why that is, because I don't find it especially difficult to believe in the "supernatural".  Perhaps it stemmed from an inability to understand how such a seemingly loving and forgiving being could also be so harsh and exacting.  But no matter how it came about that I stopped believing in "him/her/it", (and it took me a very long and confusing time to come to this conclusion), after I did I realized that even if I did believe in this "higher power" I don't know how much I like it.  Religion often teaches that (wo)men are infallible and not to be trusted.  This is true, but as a solution I have rarely heard it suggested in sermons that people should try to rely on their peers, elders and themselves to accomplish their goals or subdue their anxiety, and instead they should rest all of their troubles on some nebulous beings shoulders.  But maybe this comes from an inability on my part to comprehend what religious leaders, the Bible and "God" are trying to say.

Aside from religion I believe I've grown in how I think and approach the issue of gender. I've been thinking about this a lot lately (in part, because I'm currently reading a book about how the 2008 election affected women), especially how stereotypes negatively affect both genders.  I mean, I find it terribly demeaning to consign all women to the kitchen (*ahem* I will not make you a sandwich. Make your own goddamn sandwich ;-) ), on the part of people unwilling to allow women into other areas of society, but I find it equally demeaning for women to bully other women about making the *choice* to stay at home.  I also find the prevailing idea that feminine = weak, and masculine = strong disturbing.  This confines two vastly diverse groups of people (not to mention all outside and in between them: androgyny, bigendered, etc.) into tight compartments that are ultimately detrimental to everyone. These aren't really new ideas or concepts to anyone, not even to me, but I have been thinking about this a lot, and in general I try to be very conscious about how all of the groups everyone finds themselves a part of influences how they experiance life (even if i don't understand it).

I feel like the one of the aspects of my identity that I have had the most consistent difficulty trying to reconcile is being Black.  The problem I've found is that the prevailing stereotypes in America about black people are commonly accepted and reflected in members within the community.  All of these stereotypes make up this sort of image of what a black person (in America) is, and if a person who happens to look black doesn't think or act the way society expects them to, then that person isn't really black, they're actually white. Prompting a lot of rude comments I've found directed my way (most often and notably "oreo", but I vaguely remember someone calling me a "burnt marshmallow" before...).  I've always gotten the impression that these comments were directed at me because I was well-spoken, wasn't afraid to hide the fact I was intelligent, I used "long" words and I (apparently) can't dance.  It's always deeply insulted me that just because I acted smart I didn't get to include myself in part of the community I have always considered myself a part of.  It's also extremely counter-productive to stereotypes to kick people out of a group and denounce them when they don't fit them.  It's terribly confusing, and it often leaves me feeling like I'm sort of hanging on the periphery. I mean, I'm obviously not white, and the experiences I've had because I am (and look) black mean that it's not always easy to feel as though I can explain myself and my feelings in regards to race to anyone, because a person who hasn't experienced (something akin to) what I have, can't fully understand how I feel, and oftentimes people in my own community won't listen to me because they don't see me as a part of it (I am specifically referring to my own classmates).

My feelings on all of these issues could be further enumerated upon, but that would result in an even longer post than I'm sure this one already is, and I also have an English paper that I need to write (it is due tomorrow, but I wanted to finish this blog post first: procrastination). I'm sorry if this post is kind of all over the place -- I wrote off the top of my head and I'm tired.  If you have any questions about anything I said, please ask. I really intended to write a lot more about how I've changed in the past few years than I did, but I guess my thoughts wanted to go in a different direction than my plans (my thoughts are all over the place).

Recommendation: The band Athlete. I've been listening to them a lot over the past couple of days and I really enjoy their music. (For Doctor Who fans, their song "Chances" was played at the end of the episode "Vincent and the Doctor", when Amy and the Doctor bring Vincent to the L'œuvre )

[P.S. - Simone: I'm considering doing Script Frenzy, but if I don't do it, I might just spend the month attempting to finish my failed (first) attempt attempt at Nanowrimo. Here's hoping? :) ]

[P.P.S. If I have glaring grammatical errors, don't hesitate to correct them, I probably won't reread this until much later, and I'm sure I've missed something completely and obviously wrong]

Anywho...I'm gone now!

DFTBA

Commencement!

Hi! I am really excited to be starting this blogging expenditure! My name is Rebecca, but in Your Pants I go by the username anomalous_bibliophagus, which is mostly an unwieldy way of saying that I am pretty strange and I love reading.

So, I figure to start off you should know the basics. I think that before we dive into this, I should warn everyone that I am a massive Harry Potter nerd. Of course, I could probably be more obsessed than I currently am, but I think I drive my family and friends crazy enough as is :). I have a tendency to turn anything (and I really do mean *anything*, although some connections might take more time to make) into a Harry Potter reference (because Harry Potter relates to everything, of course), and I also get ridiculously excited when Harry Potter crops up outside of the Potter-nerdiverse sphere. Aside from Harry Potter, my obsessions include:

1) Doctor Who: By which I mean 'New Who' because I have not yet attempted to undertake the feat which is Old/Original Who, except for a few William Hartnell episodes (which, unfortunately, completely bored me, largely because Hartnell and Carol Ann Ford were slightly annoying :/). I started watching Doctor Who because I was getting sick of not understand the Who references in Charlie (McDonnell) and Alex (Day)'s videos, and once my family got a Wii and I could watch on instant play which made it easy to speed through five seasons in the space of maybe two (summer) months (maybe less). But once I was finished I was still not satiated with my new want for Doctor Who, so I would constantly re-watch episodes. It got to the point where my mom limited me to one episode per day. Natch.

2) Learning About Tudor England: Seriously, the English monarchy is one of the most fascinating things to learn about. I think this obsession started after I read 'The Other Boleyn Girl'. But I had found Tudor England fascinating before that point as well. That time period had it all: scandal, love, gossip, religious upheavals, corruption, death. Not to say that the majority of these things were *good* they're just really interesting.

3) Reading: I rarely go anywhere without book, and whenever I volunteer at my public library, I find it nearly impossible to leave without at least one book (Which quickly pile up, as I volunteer at least once a week). Reading for me has always been a sort of escape that TV and the computer can't fully satisfy (although Doctor Who comes close). I don't think there is one genre I'm partial to. I enjoy sci-fi/fantasy (probably fantasy a bit more than sci-fi), and I generally read YA novels, but honestly, I'm just a sucker for a good story. Or for an engaging non-fiction book. I also really like analyzing literature, which seems to be the bane of most high school students' existence, but I find it intriguing.

4) Writing: Although I am so self-conscious about my writing that I rarely finish the things I start, and I'm also very busy with school (and procrastinating), writing is one of my favorite things to do. The actual process of writing can be tedious sometimes, to be completely honest (which is why I don't generally write when I'm procrastinating), but when I'm on a roll its good. I've started a short story about  Gussie Manlove, so hopefully publishing this information somewhere aside from Your Pants will hold me to that.

5) Crocheting/Knitting: I don't do it often, but I'm an obsessive person, so when I get into a project I generally finish it pretty quickly.

In general I really love learning about things. There are few topics that just completely bore me. English is really my passion though, followed by history, which I think is largely because the stories and learning about certain events social impact (social studies in general are really fugging cool).

These are just a few things about me, but throughout this entire (year-long?) project hopefully these types of things will just come out naturally. (Especially the ones that I'll just completely forget I like to do). But feel free to ask if there's anything specific you want to know about me!

Is it just me, or does this post seem ridiculously long?

P.S. So, I don't know if any of you have listened to the podcast Smart Mouths, but at the end of each episode each of the hosts would give one recommendation. I think this would be a cool way to end posts, so...

My Recommendation: The book Mindblind by Jennifer Roy. It's about a 14-year-old boy named Nathaniel who has Asperger's Syndrome and an IQ of 182, attempting to become a genius (~a person who uses their intellect to accomplish something and make an impact on the world). It's a *really* good book, and it portrays Nathaniel in a really relate-able way. (My summary probably has not done the book justice).